Feelings Override Reason: Finding Balance in Decision Making

By David Hennessy, Clinical Psychologist

It is common to believe that we are primarily highly logical and rational in our decision making. In truth, decisions are usually made in a mix of rational thought and emotional influence. The emotional mind often has a louder voice and sometimes it takes the wheel entirely.

Even slight variations in emotional state can influence decision making. Research shows that our emotions shape what we pay attention to, how much risk we are willing to take, how we weigh up information, and even how confident we feel about our choices Lerner et al., 2015. This is true not just for intense states like panic or euphoria, but also for subtler shifts like mild irritation, contentment, or low level anxiety.

Why Feelings Shape Choices

• Attention filters: Emotions steer what we notice. Anxiety draws our focus to potential threats while contentment makes us more open to opportunity.
• Risk tolerance: Positive moods can increase willingness to take risks while negative moods often encourage more cautious choices Lerner et al., 2015.
• Information weighting: Emotions colour how heavily we weigh certain evidence, sometimes leading us to dismiss useful facts or overemphasise irrelevant details.
• Confidence: Mood influences how sure we feel about our judgment regardless of the actual quality of the decision Schwarz, 2012.

Steps Towards Balanced Decisions

While feelings cannot be eliminated from decision making and should not be, we can practise creating space for both head and heart:

1. Practise delayed gratification
   Giving ourselves time and space before acting helps us step back from the immediate pull of an emotion. This delay allows us to potentially view our decisions through less intense and sometimes different emotions, offering a more balanced perspective. Waiting a few hours, days or even just a few minutes can shift the balance toward wiser choices.
2. Pause and notice the mood
   Take a brief pause to ask, “What am I feeling right now and how might that be shaping this choice?”
3. Label the emotion
   Simply naming a feeling has been shown to reduce its intensity and create space for clearer thought Lieberman et al., 2007.
4. Check against values and goals
   Ask whether the choice is aligned with your longer term values rather than just your current mood.
5. Use perspective taking
   Imagine how you might view the same decision tomorrow or how a trusted friend would see it.
6. Regulate before deciding
   Practices like slow breathing, mindfulness or walking in nature can calm emotional reactivity so rational thought can join the conversation.
7. Practise reviewing past decisions with curiosity rather than judgment
   This helps us notice patterns and develop greater awareness of how moods shape choices. Over time it strengthens self understanding and supports wiser future decisions.

A Gentle Reminder

Our feelings are signals of what matters and what is happening inside us. Balanced decision making comes from listening to emotions without being ruled by them. Both reason and feeling carry wisdom and our best choices are those where they work together in balance.

References

1. Lerner, J. S., Li, Y., Valdesolo, P., & Kassam, K. S. (2015). Emotion and decision making. Annual Review of Psychology, 66, 799–823. https://doi.org/10.1146/annurev-psych-010213-115043
2. Lieberman, M. D., Eisenberger, N. I., Crockett, M. J., Tom, S. M., Pfeifer, J. H., & Way, B. M. (2007). Putting feelings into words: Affect labelling disrupts amygdala activity in response to affective stimuli. Psychological Science, 18(5), 421–428. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2007.01916.x
3. Schwarz, N. (2012). Feelings as information theory. In P. Van Lange, A. Kruglanski, & E. T. Higgins Eds., Handbook of Theories of Social Psychology Vol. 1, pp. 289–308. SAGE. https://doi.org/10.4135/9781446249215.n15

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